Using the No Contact Rule – 3 Do’s and 3 Don’ts

For some, the no contact rule seems pretty straight forward and for others, it can be kind of complicated. A lot of that depends on the context of things and how often you are going to have to actually face making the decision of having or not having contact with your ex boyfriend.

If there are no reasons at all for you to run into him, it’s a little bit easier to adhere to the no contact rule than it is if you constantly run into him in your daily life.

To make things as simple as possible, here is a short checklist that you can follow … a little list of “do’s and don’ts” that might come in handy for you:



1. DO actually try to follow the no contact rule.

A lot of people will say that they are going to go through no contact with their ex boyfriend and they don’t really mean it. They already know in the back of their mind that if they come across their ex boyfriend, they are going to talk to him and even try to get back with him right away. If you want to get the best results possible … you have to actually try to follow the no contact rule with your ex boyfriend.

2. DO act polite with him if you can’t avoid contact.

Sometimes you are going to run into him by accident and if that happens, you want to be polite. Acting like you don’t know him is just going to make him think you are being cold just to be a jerk and that’s not going to do you any good. Cut things short … but do be polite.

3. DO allow the no contact period to last for at least a few weeks.

It’s hard to put an exact timetable on how long you should go with no contact, but try to go at least a few weeks. Just a couple of days is probably not going to be enough. Now, if he happens to initiate contact and is flirtatious – that can be a good thing but at least wait for things to happen naturally if you can.


1. DON’T make some dramatic announcement to him.

This is really important. It’s not going to have the same effect if you call him up or walk up to him and announce that you are going to apply the no contact rule. I’ve actually heard of people doing that and then they wonder why it didn’t work out.

2. DON’T obsess over your ex boyfriend during this period.

This is not time to just sit at home and obsess about him. This is time to do the things that you like to do and live life to the fullest. Just sitting at home and moping during the no contact period is just going to make you more desperate to be with him again and that is NOT a good thing.

3. DON’T act cold to him if he initiates contact with you.

A lot of the time if you go for a little while without contact with your ex boyfriend and he is used to talking to you … he is going to end up initiating things. That’s a good thing and you don’t want to try to act cold or standoffish with him.

These are just some of the do’s and don’ts of using the no contact rule. They should help you get started.